You’ve crafted the perfect profile. Your photos are on point. Your bio strikes that delicate balance between witty and approachable. You swipe right on someone who makes your heart skip. And then… you freeze.
What do you say?
If you’re like 90% of Tinder users, you type “Hey” or “Hi” and hope for the best. Then you wait. And wait. And watch as that match sits in your queue, slowly collecting digital dust while you wonder what went wrong.
Here’s the brutal truth: “Hey” is the graveyard of Tinder conversations. It’s the red flag that signals low effort, low creativity, and low interest. In a sea of thousands of potential matches, “Hey” is the equivalent of showing up to a job interview in pajamas — technically you showed up, but you already lost .
The good news? The right opening line can increase your response rate by 300% or more. Research published in Personality and Individual Differences confirms what experienced daters already know: direct, personalized openers significantly outperform generic greetings .
But “direct” doesn’t mean boring, and “personalized” doesn’t require stalking their Instagram for three hours.
This isn’t just another list of corny pick-up lines. This is a comprehensive strategy guide based on psychological research, dating app algorithms, and real-world testing.
You’ll get 300+ lines organized by category, but more importantly, you’ll understand why they work so you can craft your own winning openers.
Whether you’re looking for something funny, flirty, clever, or charmingly direct, this guide has you covered. Let’s turn those matches into meaningful conversations — and those conversations into dates.
The Psychology of Perfect Opening Lines
Before diving into the lines themselves, understand the science behind why certain approaches work. This knowledge transforms you from someone who memorizes lines into someone who creates connections.
The Three Types of Pick-Up Lines
Research by T. Joel Wade and colleagues identified three distinct categories of opening lines, each with different success rates :
1. Direct Lines (Highest Success Rate)
These clearly communicate romantic interest without beating around the bush. Examples include “I find you attractive, would you like to go on a date?” or “I’m interested in getting to know you better.”
Why they work:
They eliminate ambiguity. In the fast-paced world of dating apps, clarity is refreshing. Direct lines signal confidence and respect the recipient’s time by not forcing them to decode hidden meanings.
2. Innocuous Lines (Moderate Success Rate)
These act as conversation starters without immediate romantic intent. “What’s your favorite drink?” or “How’s your week going?” fall into this category.
Why they work:
They’re low-pressure and give the conversation room to develop naturally. However, they risk being too generic and can lead to boring small-talk loops if not followed up with engaging questions .
3. Flippant/Humorous Lines (Lowest Success Rate)
These rely on humor, wordplay, or cheesiness: “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” or “Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.”
Why they often fail:
While humor is attractive, flippant lines can signal lack of seriousness or be perceived as covering for insecurity. Research shows users of flippant lines are sometimes perceived as less intelligent . However, when delivered with genuine confidence and followed by substantive conversation, they can break the ice effectively.
The Verdict:Direct lines win for converting to dates, but the best approach often combines directness with personality — showing clear interest while demonstrating you’ve actually looked at their profile.
What Your Opening Line Says About You
Your opener is a filter and an advertisement simultaneously. According to research in Evolutionary Behavioral Sciences, the type of line you choose signals specific traits :
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Humorous lines signal creativity and intelligence (when original)
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Complimentary lines highlighting specific features signal attentiveness
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Generic sexual lines signal interest only in physical attraction
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Profile-specific lines signal genuine interest and effort
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Questions about shared interests signal compatibility focus
Women, in particular, use opening lines to gauge kindness, trustworthiness, and intelligence — not just attractiveness . Men respond best to directness and clear signals of interest .
The Golden Rules of Opening Lines
Before using any line in this guide, internalize these principles:
1. Personalization Beats Perfection A mediocre line tailored to their profile outperforms a “perfect” generic line every time. Mention their dog, their travel photo, their obscure hobby, or their witty prompt answer .
2. Questions Drive Engagement Statements end conversations; questions start them. Always end your opener with a question that requires more than a yes/no answer .
3. Authenticity Attracts Don’t use a line that doesn’t match your personality. If you’re not naturally funny, don’t force humor. If you’re direct, own it. Inauthenticity is detectable and off-putting.
4. Confidence Without Arrogance The delivery matters as much as the content. Confidence is attractive; entitlement is not. There’s a fine line between “I’m interested in you” and “You should feel lucky I’m talking to you.”
5. Respect the Platform Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge have different vibes. Tinder allows for more playful directness. Bumble (where women message first) requires responses that reward their initiative. Hinge’s prompt-based system begs for specific references .
Profile-Based Personalized Openers (The Highest Converting Category)
These lines require you to actually look at their profile — which is exactly why they work. Research shows that 75% of users are more likely to respond to messages that reference specific profile details .
Photo-Based Openers
Travel Photos:
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“That view in your third photo is incredible — where is that?”
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“I see you went to Peru too! I thought I was the only one who liked getting mugged by monkeys.”
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“Is the Eiffel Tower as pretty as they make it seem? I see you went there and I trust your judgment way more than TripAdvisor.”
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“Us Bills fans are a rare breed outside of Buffalo. We should watch the next game together — I don’t like crying in public alone.”
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“How’s Berlin this time of year? I’m thinking of visiting Germany next year and need insider tips.”
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“That Peru photo is amazing! Did you do the Inca Trail or take the train?”
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“I see you’re a fellow sunset chaser. What’s the best one you’ve ever seen?”
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“Your travel photos are giving me serious wanderlust. Planned your next trip yet?”
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“I notice you have photos from Japan — what was the highlight?”
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“Beach or mountains? Your profile suggests you can’t decide either.”
Pet Photos:
11. “Judging by the number of photos with your dog, he’s clearly your BFF. What’s his name and does he approve of strangers?”
12. “Your cat looks exactly like mine, but way more chill. My Lily is basically the reincarnation of Jason Voorhees.”
13. “Important question: does your dog prefer belly rubs or ear scratches? I need to know before we meet.”
14. “I see you’re a dog person. Want to set up a playdate for our pups and see if they get along before we do?”
15. “Your golden retriever has better photo presence than most influencers. Professional model?” 16. “I’m convinced that bunnies are secretly evil hiding under cute fluffy exteriors. Your rabbit looks suspiciously innocent — thoughts?”
17. “Two types of people: those who have their pet in their dating profile, and those I don’t trust. You clearly passed the test.”
18. “Your dog is adorable, but I’m really here to see if the human is as loyal and friendly.”
19. “Does your cat actually like you, or is this a hostage situation? Hard to tell with cats.”
20. “I’m allergic to cats but willing to take Benadryl for the right person. How’s your cat with visitors?”
Activity/Sport Photos:
21. “You sure love volleyball, from what I can tell. I did some in high school and even won a bronze medal — mostly for enthusiasm.”
22. “A football coach, wow! I’m actually studying sports coaching and would love some tips from a pro.”
23. “Tips for someone just getting into camping? I could be wrong, but I’m assuming you set up those tents yourself.”
24. “I see you’re a dancer. I don’t dance on first dates (coordination issues), but maybe by the third?”
25. “Your hiking photos are impressive. What’s the most challenging trail you’ve done?”
26. “I see you play guitar — covers or originals? And more importantly, do you take requests?”
27. “Yoga enthusiast? I tried it once and spent most of the class trying not to fall over. Any beginner tips?”
28. “Your rock climbing photos are amazing. Indoor or outdoor? And are you the type to belay for beginners?”
29. “I see you run marathons. What’s your pre-race ritual? Mine involves panic and regret.”
30. “Your ski photos look epic. East Coast ice or West Coast powder?”
Food/Drink Photos:
31. “A cheese connoisseur? Just my type. What’s your go-to for a dinner party?”
32. “I see you like spicy food… makes sense. Some people think ketchup is spicy.”
33. “Important test: what’s your favorite ice cream flavor? This is a dealbreaker situation.”
34. “Vegetarian cuisine is so good! I’m a new vegetarian and would love to learn new recipes.”
35. “Your cocktail game looks strong. What’s your signature drink?”
36. “I see you’re a coffee person. Black coffee purist or fancy latte with art?”
37. “Garlic bread or banana bread? There’s a right answer here.”
38. “Your sourdough looks professional. How many failed loaves before you got that rise?”
39. “I see you enjoy wine. Red, white, or ‘whatever’s on sale’?”
40. “Your brunch photos are making me hungry. Best brunch spot in the city — go!”
Fashion/Style Photos:
41. “You got a keen eye for jeans, based on your photos. I view everything denim as my arch-nemesis. Teach me your ways?”
42. “Where did you get that Kate Bush tee? Asking for a friend… okay, asking for me.”
43. “Hoodies for the win. I notice you’re a woman of culture as well.”
44. “Your blue hair is so cool. I’m thinking of growing out of my boring brown hair phase — worth it?”
45. “It’s so refreshing seeing men wear fun ties instead of boring navy ones. Where do you shop?” 46. “Your vintage style is on point. Thrift store queen or curated collection?”
47. “I see you have a thing for statement earrings. Bold choices — I respect it.”
48. “Your sneaker game is strong. Collector or just lucky finds?”
49. “That leather jacket in your second photo — vintage find or new investment piece?”
50. “Your aesthetic is very ‘main character energy.’ What movie are we in?”
Prompt-Based Openers (Hinge/Bumble Specific)
“My simple pleasures” prompt:
51. “Simple pleasures are the best. What’s one that always makes your day better?” 52. “I see your simple pleasure is morning coffee. Dark roast or ‘whatever’s caffeinated’?”
“Two truths and a lie” prompt:
53. “I’m going to guess the lie is that you met a celebrity. The other two are too specific to be made up.” 54. “Two truths and a lie expert here. The lie is definitely [X] because no one actually enjoys [Y].”
“Dating me is like” prompt:
55. “Dating you is like finding extra fries at the bottom of the bag — unexpected and delightful. Accurate?” 56. “I see dating you is like a rollercoaster. Thrilling or nauseating? Be honest.”
“My greatest strength” prompt:
57. “Your greatest strength is parallel parking? Marry me. Seriously, that’s a superpower.” 58. “You say your strength is patience, yet you’re on dating apps. The irony isn’t lost on me.”
“I get along best with people who” prompt:
59. “You get along best with people who love bad puns? Challenge accepted. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.” 60. “People who love dogs and hate small talk? We might be soulmates or about to have a very quiet relationship.”
“My most controversial opinion” prompt:
61. “Pineapple on pizza is your controversial opinion? That’s entry-level controversial. I respect the caution though.” 62. “You think cereal is soup? This is either brilliant or horrifying and I need to hear your reasoning.”
“I’m looking for” prompt:
63. “You’re looking for someone to bring to family events so they stop asking why you’re single? I’m available for rent, reasonable rates.” 64. “Someone who won’t judge your Spotify Wrapped? My top artist was the Minecraft soundtrack. No judgment here.”
“The key to my heart is” prompt:
65. “The key to your heart is good coffee and better conversation? I can provide one and attempt the other.” 66. “Memes and mozzarella sticks? You have simple needs and I respect that deeply.”
“My love language is” prompt:
67. “Physical Touch? No way. Your love language has got to be picking out clothes for your friends since you’re a designer.” 68. “Words of affirmation? Let me practice: you’re doing great and your profile made me smile.”
“I’ll fall for you if” prompt:
69. “You’ll fall for me if I can make you laugh? Risky strategy, but I’ll take those odds.” 70. “If I beat you at Mario Kart? Challenge accepted, but I should warn you — I’m very competitive.”
Funny & Clever Openers That Break the Ice
Humor, when done right, creates instant connection. These lines work because they’re unexpected, show creativity, and give the other person an easy way to engage. Warning: If they don’t respond to your humor, they might not be compatible with your personality — which is valuable information too.
Self-Deprecating Humor (Relatable & Disarming)
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“I’m not great at math, but I’m pretty good at chemistry. Let’s test that theory?”
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“I’m writing a term paper on the finer things in life, and I was wondering if I could interview you.”
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“I was blinded by your beauty; I’m going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.”
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“I’m not photographer, but I can definitely picture us together.”
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“Do you have a name, or can I call you mine? (I promise I’m usually less cheesy.)”
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“I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen us in the same room together? Think about it.”
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“My therapist says I need to work on my opening lines. How am I doing so far?”
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“I’m the kind of person who reads the menu online before going to a restaurant. What does that say about me?”
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“I tried to come up with a clever line, but then I remembered I’m not that clever. Hi, I’m [Name].”
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“My superpower is making awkward situations more awkward. Want to see it in action?”
Pop Culture & Media References
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“Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got ‘FINE’ written all over you. (Classic but effective.)”
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“If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber. If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple.”
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“Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for.”
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“Are you WiFi? Because I’m really feeling a connection.”
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“Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!”
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“If you were a Transformer, you’d be Optimus Fine.”
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“Are you a camera? Every time I look at you, I smile.”
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“Is your dad a baker? Because you’re a cutie pie!”
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“Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.”
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“If you were words on a page, you’d be fine print.”
Absurdist & Random (For the Bold)
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“Do you think ghosts exist but we can’t see them since they’re, you know… ghosts?”
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“The best out-of-the-box cheesecake flavor: guacamole vs. ranch. Defend your choice.”
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“Do you think you could actually train a dragon? Let’s be real, they’re too aggressive.”
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“I’m about to go explore the Bermuda Triangle — you in or nah?”
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“Would you rather live in Silent Hill or Gotham City? Both have issues, but different vibes.”
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“How many chips could you eat before getting sick? Individually, I mean. I think I could do 86.”
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“Don’t you think Satan’s tired of all the letters he receives during Christmas from dyslexic kids?”
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“If you could replace our hands with ice cream cones, would you do it? I’m talking solid ones that don’t break.”
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“If given the choice, would you make headaches or stomachaches disappear for life?”
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“I think we should all replace suits with princess dresses. Any better suggestions? Suits bore me.”
Clever Wordplay & Puns
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“Have I told you U-tah best? (Sorry, had to make that joke about your location.)”
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“I thought it’s spelled Eh-muh-lee, not Eh-meh-li. You learn something new every day.”
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“You have one of those ancient warrior names. I don’t know how to explain it, but it’s very cool.”
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“Let me guess… Billy Idol’s ‘Eyes Without a Face’? Absolute classic.”
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“We’re the same type of weird, from what I’ve seen, because I love summoning evil from other realms too.”
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“Strange, you hype yourself up through self-affirmations. For me it’s self-deprecations. Opposites attract?”
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“Thank God. I was looking for someone who could help me train my parrot.”
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“The first time I’ve met a Floridian in the wild. I gotta say, I’m excited.”
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“A Neurologist? I guess your job doesn’t have enough crazy people, so you’ve come to dating apps.”
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“Obsessed with Forrest Green? It looks amazing on you. (Both the color and the aesthetic.)”
Flirty & Direct Openers (For Confident Connections)
These lines clearly signal romantic interest without being creepy. They work because they respect the other person’s time and intelligence — no games, just genuine attraction.
Direct & Confident
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“I’m going to be honest — your profile made me stop scrolling. Want to grab coffee and see if the conversation matches the photos?”
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“I find you attractive, and I’d like to get to know you better. Interested?”
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“Your profile caught my attention. When are you free for a drink this week?”
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“I’m interested in you. Tell me something about yourself that isn’t in your profile.”
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“You seem like someone worth knowing. Want to skip the small talk and meet for ice cream?”
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“I’m not great at texting for weeks. Want to meet up and see if we click in person?”
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“Your photos are great, but I’m more interested in what’s behind the smile. Tell me something real.”
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“I swiped right because you seem genuine. Am I right?”
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“You have the kind of profile that makes me want to delete the app. Coffee this weekend?”
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“I’m going to cut to the chase — you seem awesome. Drinks?”
Playfully Flirty
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“Your hand looks heavy — can I hold it for you?”
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“Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else.”
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“Do you believe in love at first swipe, or should I unmatch and swipe again?”
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“See my friend over there? They want to know if you think I’m cute.”
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“I’m not saying you stole my heart, but I definitely felt something when I saw your profile.”
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Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.”
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“Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes.”
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“Excuse me, but I think you dropped something: my jaw.”
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“If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.”
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“I’m not a mathematician, but I’m pretty good with numbers. Can I have yours?”
Compliments That Actually Work
Specific compliments (not just “you’re hot”):
131. “Your smile in the third photo is contagious. What was happening there?”
132. “You have really kind eyes. It’s the first thing I noticed.”
133. “Your style is really unique — I love that you don’t look like everyone else on here.”
134. “You seem like the kind of person who makes friends everywhere they go. Am I right?”
135. “Your profile radiates good energy. What’s your secret?”
136. “I love that you’re passionate about [hobby from profile]. That’s really attractive.”
137. “You have one of those faces that makes people feel comfortable. It’s a gift.”
138. “Your sense of adventure is really appealing. When’s your next trip?”
139. “I can tell from your profile that you’re creative. What are you working on right now?”
140. You seem genuinely happy in your photos. That’s rarer than you’d think on dating apps.”
Question-Based Openers
Questions demand answers. These openers work because they give the other person an easy way to respond while revealing something about their personality.
Would You Rather…?
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“Would you rather have the ability to fly or be invisible? And what would you do first?”
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“Would you rather be able to speak every language or play every instrument?”
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“Would you rather have unlimited sushi for life or unlimited tacos?”
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“Would you rather travel to the past or the future? And why?”
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“Would you rather be famous but poor or rich but unknown?”
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“Would you rather have a rewind button or a pause button for your life?”
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“Would you rather always be 10 minutes late or 20 minutes early?”
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“Would you rather have a pet dragon or be a dragon?”
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“Would you rather never use social media again or never watch TV again?”
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“Would you rather have the power to read minds or the power to change the weather?”
This or That?
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“Beach vacation or mountain retreat?”
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“Coffee date or cocktail date?”
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“Early bird or night owl?”
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“Texting or calling?”
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“Big party or intimate dinner?”
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“Spontaneous adventure or planned itinerary?”
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“Physical book or e-reader?”
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“Cooking at home or trying new restaurants?”
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“City life or country living?”
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“Summer or winter?”
Deep But Playful
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“What’s something you’re really good at that most people don’t know about?”
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“What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?”
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“If you could have dinner with any three people, dead or alive, who would they be?”
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“What’s your favorite way to spend a Sunday?”
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“What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?”
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“If you could instantly become an expert in something, what would it be?”
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“What’s your go-to karaoke song? (Be honest.)”
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“What’s something you’ve always wanted to try but haven’t yet?”
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“If you won the lottery tomorrow, what’s the first thing you’d do?”
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“What’s your favorite thing about your hometown?”
Situational & Timely Openers
These lines reference current events, seasons, or shared experiences. They feel immediate and relevant.
Seasonal Lines
Summer:
171. “It’s officially ice cream season. What’s your go-to flavor?”
172. “Beach weather is here — sand castle expert or wave jumper?”
173. “Summer plans: travel everywhere or perfect the art of doing nothing?”
174. “It’s too hot for small talk. Favorite summer activity — go!”
175. “Poolside reading or rooftop drinks?”
Fall:
176. “Pumpkin spice season is upon us. Basic or unapologetic enthusiast?”
177. “Fall is perfect for hiking. Best trail you’ve done this season?”
178. “Halloween costume planning: start in August or night before?”
179. “Cozy sweater weather or still mourning summer?”
180. “Apple picking: cute date activity or just an excuse for cider donuts?”
Winter:
181. “It’s freezing. Hot chocolate or mulled wine to warm up?”
182. “Winter plans: hibernate or embrace the cold?”
183. “Holiday movie marathon: Home Alone or Die Hard? (Yes, it’s a Christmas movie.)”
184. “Ski trip or beach escape this winter?”
185. “Best way to spend a snow day?”
Spring:
186. “Spring cleaning: actually organizing or just moving clutter around?”
187. “Allergy season survivor? What’s your secret weapon?”
188. “Spring fever: real phenomenon or just nice weather?”
189. “Easter candy: Peeps or hard pass?”
190. “Spring break as an adult: still a thing or just a Tuesday?”
Current Events & Pop Culture (Update as needed)
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“Did you watch [current popular show]? No spoilers, but worth the hype?”
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“Be honest — are you team [celebrity drama] or team [other side]?”
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“The new [album/movie] just dropped. Have you listened/watched yet?”
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“How are you surviving [current weather event]?”
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“Did you see [viral moment]? I need someone’s take on this.”
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“Weekend plans: avoiding the crowds or diving into the chaos?”
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“Working from home or back to office? How’s that treating you?”
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“Any good Netflix recommendations? I’m in a serious rut.”
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“How do you feel about [recent viral trend]? Genius or overhyped?”
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“It’s [day of week], which means we’re legally required to discuss weekend plans. Yours?”
Bold & Edgy Openers (High Risk, High Reward)
These lines aren’t for everyone, but when they land, they land hard. Use with caution and only if they match your personality.
Confidently Direct
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“I’m going to skip the small talk — you’re attractive and seem interesting. Coffee?”
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“Your profile is good, but I’m betting you’re better in person. Prove me right?”
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“I don’t usually message first, but your profile demanded attention. Tell me something unexpected.”
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“Let’s be honest — we’re both here because swiping is easier than meeting at bars. Want to skip to the part where we meet?”
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“I’m interested. You’re interested (you swiped right). Why are we still typing?”
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“Your photos are doing a lot of heavy lifting, but I’m curious about the person behind them.”
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“I’m going to take a risk here — you seem worth getting to know. Am I wrong?”
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“Dating apps are exhausting. Want to be the reason I delete this one?”
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“I’m not here for pen pals. Want to grab a drink and see if there’s chemistry?”
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“Your profile says you’re [trait]. I’m [complementary trait]. Let’s test the theory.”
Playfully Provocative
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“I’m going to say something controversial: [mildly controversial opinion]. Thoughts?”
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“Rate my opening line on a scale of 1-10. Be honest — I can take it.”
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“Truth or dare? (Choose truth, I’m not creative enough for dares yet.)”
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“Two truths and a lie: I’m a good cook, I’ve never been arrested, and I’m messaging you because I’m bored. Which is the lie?”
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“I’m making a list of reasons to delete this app. Give me one good one to keep it.”
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“Your profile is suspiciously perfect. What’s the catch?”
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“I’m going to guess three things about you from your profile. If I’m right, you owe me a coffee.”
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“Challenge: tell me something about yourself that isn’t in your profile. If you can’t, I get to ask anything.”
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“I’m betting you’re more interesting than your photos suggest. Want to prove me right or let me live with my disappointment?”
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“Let’s play a game: I ask you a question, you ask me one. First one to make the other laugh wins. You start.”
Response-Based Follow-Ups (Keeping the Conversation Alive)
Getting a reply is only half the battle. These lines help you maintain momentum and steer toward a date.
When They Reply With Minimal Effort
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“Short and sweet — I like it. But I’m going to need a little more to work with. What’s your favorite way to spend a Saturday?”
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“Is that your standard reply, or are you testing my persistence? Either way, challenge accepted.”
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“I’ll take that as a ‘tell me more about yourself.’ So, what’s something you’re passionate about?”
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“Not much of a texter? Me neither. Want to skip to the part where we meet in person?”
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“I’ll interpret that as interest. When are you free this week?”
When They Ask About You
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“I’m [basic info], but more importantly, I’m curious about [something from their profile]. Tell me more.”
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“By day I’m [job], by night I’m [hobby]. But enough about me — what’s your superpower?”
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“I’m the kind of person who [funny trait]. What about you?”
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“I’m currently [recent activity]. Recommend something fun to do this weekend?”
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“I’m [adjective] but [contradictory adjective]. Example: I’m organized but my kitchen is always a mess. Your turn.”
Moving to the Date
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“This is going well, but I’m better in person. Coffee this weekend?”
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“I’m enjoying this conversation, but I’d rather continue it over drinks. When are you free?”
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“We should probably meet before we run out of things to text about. [Activity] this week?”
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“I’m going to take a risk and ask: want to grab [coffee/drinks/ice cream] and see if we click?”
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“You’ve passed the text test. Final round: in-person meeting. When works for you?”
Lines to Avoid
Just as important as knowing what works is knowing what doesn’t. These are the lines that kill conversations before they start:
The Generic Death Sentences
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❌ “Hey”
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❌ “Hi”
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❌ “What’s up”
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❌ “How are you?”
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❌ “How’s your day?”
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❌ “How’s it going?”
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❌ “Hello beautiful”
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❌ “You’re cute”
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❌ “What’s up gorgeous”
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❌ “Hi, how are you?”
Why they fail: Zero effort, zero personality, zero reason to respond. These messages signal that you send the same line to everyone and haven’t looked at their profile
The Immediate Red Flags
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❌ “DTF?” (Or any immediate sexual proposition)
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❌ “Want to hook up?”
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❌ “Send nudes”
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❌ “What are you looking for on here?” (Too intimate for an opener)
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❌ “Want to get a drink tonight?” (Too soon, no rapport)
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❌ “I’m bored, entertain me”
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❌ “You’re not like other girls/guys here” (Negging)
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❌ “Why are you single?” (Invasive)
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❌ “You look like trouble” (Cliché and slightly insulting)
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❌ “My place or yours?” (Immediate block)
Why they fail: Too sexual, too aggressive, too lazy, or too insulting. These lines attract the wrong kind of attention
The Overused Clichés
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❌ “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
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❌ “Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.”
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❌ “Is your name WiFi? Because I’m feeling a connection.” (Unless used ironically)
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❌ “Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.”
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❌ “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.” (Cute but overused)
Why they fail: These lines are so common they’re memes. Unless you have a unique twist, they signal lack of originality.
The Strategy Behind the Lines
When to Use Which Type
For profiles with lots of detail: Use personalized, profile-specific openers (Chapter 2). Reference their photos, prompts, or bio details.
For minimal profiles: Use funny or random questions (Chapter 3, 5) to spark engagement and learn more about them.
For confident, direct personalities: Use flirty, direct openers (Chapter 4) to signal clear interest.
For shy or anxious matches: Use low-pressure questions (Chapter 5) to make responding easy.
For immediate date conversion: Use situational or bold openers (Chapters 6-7) to skip small talk.
The Follow-Up Formula
Getting a reply is step one. Here’s how to maintain momentum:
1. Mirror Their Energy If they write three sentences, you write three sentences. If they’re brief, don’t overwhelm them with paragraphs.
2. Answer Your Own Question Don’t just ask questions — share about yourself too. Conversation is a two-way street.
3. Move to Specifics Quickly “What’s your favorite restaurant?” leads to “We should go there sometime” much faster than generic chat.
4. Know When to Pivot to a Date Research suggests 6-10 messages is the sweet spot for asking for a date. Too soon seems rushed; too long creates pen-pal syndrome.
Reading the Room
Green Lights (Keep Going):
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They ask you questions back
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They use exclamation points and emojis
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They share personal details
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They respond quickly
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They reference your profile
Red Lights (Move On):
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One-word answers consistently
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No questions in return
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Days between responses
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Generic responses that could apply to anyone
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Excuses when you suggest meeting
50 More Bonus Lines
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“Your profile says you like [activity]. I’m a complete beginner but willing to learn — patient teacher or laugh at my failures?”
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“I’m going to need you to settle a bet: is cereal soup?”
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“What’s your most controversial opinion that isn’t actually that controversial?”
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“Tell me your favorite dad joke. I’ll rate it on a scale of eye-roll to actual laugh.”
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“If you could only eat one cuisine for the rest of your life, what would it be? (And yes, ‘street food’ counts as a cuisine.)”
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“What’s the worst opening line you’ve gotten on here? I promise to do better.”
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“Your profile mentions [book/movie/show]. I have opinions. Want to hear them?”
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“I’m currently accepting applications for a partner in crime. Requirements: must enjoy [activity from their profile].”
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“What’s something you’re looking forward to this month?”
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“If you had to describe yourself using only three emojis, which would you choose?”
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“I’m going to guess your favorite color based on your profile. Is it [color]?”
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“What’s your favorite way to unwind after a long week?”
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“Your photos suggest you’re adventurous. What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve done lately?”
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“I’m trying to expand my music taste. What should I listen to first?”
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“What’s your favorite thing about your job? (If you say ‘the paycheck,’ I won’t judge.)”
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“If you could have any superpower, but it had to be slightly useless, what would you choose?”
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“What’s your go-to coffee order? I’m conducting very important research.”
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“Your profile mentions you like cooking. What’s your signature dish? (And will you make it for me?)”
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“What’s the best concert you’ve ever been to?”
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“If you could live anywhere in the world for a year, where would you go?”
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“What’s your favorite season and why?”
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“I’m planning my next vacation. Sell me on your favorite destination.”
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“What’s something you’re really good at that surprised you?”
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“Your profile says you’re [trait]. On a scale of 1-10, how [trait] are we talking?”
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“What’s your favorite way to spend a rainy day?”
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“If you could have dinner with any fictional character, who would it be?”
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“What’s the best meal you’ve had recently?”
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“I’m trying to get into [hobby from their profile]. Any beginner tips?”
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“What’s something you’ve always wanted to learn but haven’t started yet?”
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“Your photos are great, but I’m curious — what’s something you love that you didn’t post about?”
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“What’s your favorite thing to do in [their city] that most tourists don’t know about?”
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“If you could instantly master any skill, what would you choose?”
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“What’s your favorite childhood movie that still holds up?”
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“I’m going to take a wild guess: you’re a [dog/cat/both/neither] person. Am I right?”
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“What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever ignored?”
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“If you had to eat the same meal every day for a month, what would it be?”
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What’s your favorite way to start a Sunday morning?”
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“Your profile mentions [interest]. How did you get into that?”
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“I’m going to be honest — I’m running out of clever openers. Want to just grab coffee instead?”
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“You seem interesting. Tell me something true about yourself that sounds made up.”
Conclusion:
Here’s the secret that transforms good openers into great relationships: the line gets you the reply, but you get you the date.
These 300+ lines are tools — conversation starters designed to break through the noise of dating apps and signal that you’re worth talking to. But they’re just the beginning. The real magic happens when you listen to their responses, share authentically about yourself, and recognize when it’s time to move from digital banter to real-world connection.
Remember the research: direct, personalized approaches work best
- Women respond to signals of kindness, intelligence, and attentiveness
- Men respond to clarity and clear interest
- Everyone responds to feeling seen as an individual, not just another match in an endless queue.
The perfect opening line doesn’t exist — but the right line for this moment, this person, and this connection does. Use this guide as inspiration, not a script. Adapt these lines to your voice. Personalize them to their profile. And most importantly, follow through with genuine curiosity and respect.
Your next great conversation is one message away. Send it.
Final Tip: Save your favorite lines in your notes app. When you match with someone interesting, take 30 seconds to customize one of these openers to their profile. That small investment of time signals effort, and effort is the rarest commodity on dating apps.
